Good Old Bobby

Good old Bobby was usually a happy drunk, but every once in a while, he’d get all salty about one thing or another. Then it was a whole new ball of wax, especially if he got his dander up about something and drank whiskey instead of rum. That was always cause for, well, let’s call it an adventure.

Last week was one of those times. Now why Bobby ever bought whiskey I’ll never know. Everyone knew what it did to him, including him!

So, anyway, Bobby was at home, drinking and watching his favorite show. I’m not even sure what show it was, probably one of them damn soap operas disguised as a cop show or some such thing.

Now this episode of the show had an unpleasant surprise that just rubbed Bobby the wrong way. On a rum-kinda night, it wouldn’t have been any big thing, but tonight Bobby was drinking whiskey.

Well, the plot twist sent his anger through the roof and Bobby was ranting and raving in the living room.

By this time, he was slurring, but good. It’s a wonder anyone could understand him at all, but Gladys, well, she’d lived with old Bobby for 35 years, so it didn’t take much for her to know what was up.

Gladys stayed busy in the kitchen, but she heard Bobby slamming about the house. Pretty soon she heard him threatening someone with a ‘knuckle sandwich.’ With a heavy sigh, she went to intervene, hoping it wasn’t one of the neighbor kids.

She heard him stumbling about, yelling and slurring “Now donnnnchu tell ME whattado! Imma punchu inna vase! Thaaaassssss RIGHT misterman. Imma gonna come right up thar and punchu inna vase! Right in the nose! Bam! Thassa what Imma do!” Gladys heard a crash and started running.

She came around the corner of the bathroom and started laughing. There was old Bobby, standing in front of the now broken bathroom mirror looking confused. His knuckles were bleeding and there was glass everywhere.

Good old Bobby had punched himself… right in his reflection’s “face”!


This is today’s 5 minute freewrite thanks to @mariannewest on steemit. The prompt was “vase”

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